Thursday, 18 July 2013

Do you judge a person by their name?

This interview took England by storm a few weeks ago and I would like you to have a watch. It's only 5 minutes, but if like me, it may leave your blood boiling...

So do you judge a person and what they have become on their name?

I actually cannot understand the nerve of this woman to say that a persons name affects or reflects their behaviours, their class and their personality. I just think it is a horrible thing to do. It's very stereotypical and boxing someone in because of that can be hurtful.

I think the naming of someone is a personal thing. For example, when Kim Kardashian called her daughter North West. Do I like the name? No because to me it sounds silly but if Kim and Kanye like it then it's their personal choosing. But I don't think of the name North, Grace, Charmaine, Tyler etc as being a certain class. I most certainly don't think if I hear those names in conversation or outside that that person is unkind or naughty! And i would never stop my child from befriending another child simply because I don't like their name.

We all have opinions on names because as humans we cannot like everything. I will admit the only thing I judge about names if I hear them in public is whether I think they are common. At the moment i hear the name Grace a lot. It's a beautiful name!!! But I do think 'that's a very common name at the moment' but it never goes beyond any other critical judgement.

What kind of message are we sending out to people and especially our kids if we think like that? 

So I'm curious - what do you think? Is Katie Hopkins being snotty? Or do you think a person's name is a reflection of their upbringing and social status?


Laura Anne said...

I'll put my hand up and confess - I'm super judgmental about naming children. I think it really does matter, and can have a positive/negative effect on a child's life. And ok, some of my judgments are personal pet peeves (like when it looks like a parent just couldn't spell the name they liked).

I do think she is right on one point - there are certain names that fit certain stereotypes. And stereotypes do have some basis in some kind of truth. I'd be surprised to hear anyone tell me that certain names don't have certain connotations because of your experience of people who had that name.

HOWEVER. Yes, I think she was unbelievably snobby, because to judge a CHILD on their name - something they had no control over - is wrong. Even if that kid does come from 'the wrong side of the tracks', unless they've done something to actually prove themselves untrustworthy to be allowed in your home (like when we caught a "friend" of one of our siblings stealing money from us and found out that child was bullying my sibling) then it just seems to me to be completely prejudiced. And actually, just because a kid comes from a tough background (whether it be that they have a Mum who's so judgmental she tries to control their friendships, or a Mum that maybe struggles with mental health problems or a Mum that struggles with addiction...) then maybe you might be able to be a positive influence in that kid's life.

As I said on my facebook page....yep, I do judge Gwyneth & Chris for calling their daughter, Apple, but Apple would still be welcome in my home regardless of her name.

Ok. I've now written an essay!! Sorry Becca. I'll step off my soapbox now...!!

Ashley said...

I agree. However, there are certain names I won't name my kid:

1.) Anthony - Most (not all) Anthony's I know are trouble makers. My cousin Anthony though, sweet as pie. BUT... all the others I know, have gotten into some sort of trouble with the law.
2.) Pam - Again, most Pam's I seem to be a little crazy. Not all, I know some that seem perfectly normal. But what was probably a main factor for me not liking this name was when my aunt went psycho and tried taking her sister to court, and after her sister won, she told the lawyer that she knew that her sister didn't steal any money. Uhhh... yah. Anyways...

However, that doesn't mean I wouldn't let a Pam or an Anthony step in my house. That would be crazy. Nor, would I not let my kids hang out with a kid named that. Those are just my personal reasons on why I'm not naming our kids that.

P.S. I think Apple is a beautiful name, especially if you didn't know Apple was a fruit.

<3 Ash

Stacie said...

After working in healthcare taking care of children, many of those as brand new human beings... I do think names are important. I think some names are very cute but not necessarily "grown-up" names. And parents who spell their names super different are not helping the child either. No one will ever spell their name right. Ever. My name isn't too different but it still gets misspelled. Does that mean if Mary befriends someone with a name I don't like she can't come play? No. I have had parents tell me their new baby's name but they can't spell it. Really? One of my faves- Ohnesty. It ranks up there with Nevaeh. Your name on a resume as an adult is the first thing they see- sadly some names will not get taken seriously. Naming a child is one of a parent's most important jobs. Okay. Stepping off soapbox.

Life in a Small Town said...

1st off...I love Anna May!
When we were trying to decide what to name our youngest, we tossed around names, and I immediately threw out the names of children I knew from school who were trouble-makers. wasn't because of their name, it was because I would always be reminded of that kid! I have noticed that boys named "Chris" seem to be a bit hyper and immature for some reason.
I think that it is absolutely absurd and snotty to not let your child play with someone who happens to have a name that you don't like. Here's what got me: She won't let her children play/be friends with kids with a certain name, but she doesn't know the surnames of her kids' friends? I just couldn't get past that one. Not that I would judge a child by their surname, but I do think it's important to know their full name, as well as the parents before allowing my child to go over to their house.

Janet said...

I certainly wouldn't judge a person by their name. Choosing a child's name is important, because they have to live with that name and ultimately it's the parent's choice. Obviously one would choose a name that one liked, and I agree that sometimes, one does have a bad association with certain names. But that does not mean all "Ryan's"for example are naughty!

Thinking about you a lot Rebecca and hope you're keeping your chin up!


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