Monday, 7 March 2011

What N-O really means.

I really wish I was superwoman sometimes, with the ability to say the word no. Do you ever try to be him/her and end up resenting saying yes when you mean no?

courtesy of this  pretty place.

The classic example was last week when my manager said "Bec any chance you could work your day off and do a long day (13.5 hour shift) tomorrow. We're really short staffed and I'm desperate!" And of course being the doolally I am said "Well...yeah of course I will had no plans anyway."

Well the other plan of catching up with sleep and having time to myself went through my head after I said the opposite of what I wanted to say. But you get my drift? I find this trait in me so frustrating. I always used to think it was selfish to say no, or its rude to turn down someone requesting help and I genuinely enjoy helping others out. 

But when I start to lose sleep, not see my friends, not get to spend my hard earned money I do start to resent myself. As quite often the deed is hardly ever reciprocated and I end up feeling like someone's doormat. In my break at work yesterday I counted how many times in the last week I had said yes, but meant no. It was 12 times.

12 times too many.

I need to learn the art of saying no because I am not Superwoman, Oprah or even Michelle Obama that seem like they can handle everything (and still look good). Otherwise I will just wear myself out. As let's be honest N-O really means Y-E-S. Anyone walking the same plank as me?


ktjane said...

One thing I have learned is that you have to learn to say no sometimes. Otherwise, you will drive yourself crazy! But, in all honesty, I still haven't gotten great at saying "no" even when I would like to!

Kristen said...

I agree with ktjane it will always be a struggle of mine to say jo. I feel that when I say no I feel like I would be missing out on something, whether it's a night out or even possible acceptance from someone, or even worse to be liked!

Totally walking the same plank as you girl!

Mere said...

I am most definitely you! I have no concept of being able to say "no" and even in those moments where I attempt to say "no," I end up saying "yes" instead. Talk about annoying!!

We'll work on this together and get it eventually...hopefully!

Love, Mere

Callie Nicole said...

Oh, I can relate! It takes practice, but it does get easier to say no. I'm not super-good at it either though - I always feel like I have to have a really solid reason to say no, even though it might just simply be because I don't have time, or I need a break.

a life of color said...

I have a tendency of doing the same thing. I don't mind to help people out when they are in need but when the favor is not reciprocated is when I really start to get upset.

Good luck learning how to say NO, it sounds like you could use some sleeep and alone time.

Alex(andra) said...

I have this problem. All the time. Especially when talking to someone face-to-face. I can't say no. If it's through texting I can usually find a way to say no. How sad is that?

I hope you get to catch up on your sleep!

Holly said...

Oh yeah, I am most definitely a member of the Can't Say No Club. :S

Ashley said...

saying no is so hard. :( And you hate to disappoint people. 12 times in one week? That is an eye opener.

<3 Ash

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